Fill or No Fill??? and my Sweet Spot

More than a year later.....

I have left many of you hanging after my last post several months ago.....Well...I got my fill or fills by now. I have had three fills since my last post. So that is a total of five fills. For some of you that are just joining my blog...you may be asking yourself "Fill? What is a Fill?" When a person gets the lap band procedure done to help aide in weight loss, a band goes around the stomach. The band is tight in the beginning due to swelling of the stomach from the surgery. But eventually the band is not as tight. So the band is made with a silicon ring inside of it. A Dr. then gradually fills the band with saline, making the band tighter and tighter. A patient is supposed to go into the Dr. every 4 to 6 weeks for a fill until their band is at what is considered the "sweet spot" (perfect amount of restriction and limitation on food intake). According to some people in my support group and my dr., that "sweet spot" is not obtained until about the 4th fill. I had two fills a year ago and then stopped going to the Dr. due to insurance reasons and out of fear or self sabotage. But I finally got approval from insurance this spring and have started going in for fills.

I started back up again in March. I have been three times. I did not post about the first two fills in March and April because I could not tell a difference. In fact I gained weight after my first fill back in March (fill #3 in total). I was very disappointed in myself! I got another fill in a April and felt a little difference but had really really high hopes in that fill. Because everyone had said it really kicks in at fill #4. I still did not feel that different. Still not much restriction. So I got another fill yesterday. For those other banders out there you might be wondering how much I have had filled so far in total. For some reason that is the question every bander asked other banders. It really means nothing to other people. I have had 7.6cc. I was told yesterday that my band will hold 9 total.

so how do I feel today after this fill????? I feel GREAT!!! I have finally HIT THAT SWEET SPOT!!! I can only take a few bites and I am FULL!!! This is what I have been waiting for! This is what I went into surgery a year ago for. I should have started feeling like this 5 months after the surgery and not 13 months after the surgery. I lost 8 months of progress!

So where am I at in my weight?? I am not telling a number right now because of the weight I gained over the winter. But I am still down from where I was a year ago. I am still not back into my "fat" clothes from pre surgery, so for that I am proud. But I do have some clothes from the fall that I don't fit into because of the weight I gained. I am hoping to be back into those soon with my new found sweet spot. I am hoping to finally work hard to make it my true goal.

Some have wondered about my dance recital as well.... I had promised myself that after my surgery I would sign up for a dance class. I wrote last time about how I did and I stuck with it. My recital is in a month. I will be wearing a little sassy black dress with big bright orange and red roses all over it. and it is spaghetti strap. Will I be looking like I had visioned I would look in that dress?? NO! but I am going through with it. I am getting up on that stage, all of me, and DANCING!!!!

Still NO Picture! But next month I promise to post a pic of me in my recital dress. I will be BRAVE!